Midsummer. There is a potency in the air, an intensity of energy building until it reaches it’s peak. For me it is an unsettling time, my nerves are on edge waiting for this bubble to burst, a feeling that it is all too much for my sensitive soul. Too loud, too bright, too much “on” and not enough “off”. Is this new with peri-menopause? Yes and no. It is new to me as an adult yet there is a remembering of how I was before oestrogen covered me in her soft blanket, smoothing out my edges, increasing my tolerance, somehow covering a deeply authentic part of my nature. That authentic part is back now. She is pulling the curtains in the middle of the day to block out the sun. She is avoiding gatherings unless they are very small and calm and ah… Gatherings that feel like an outbreath are music to my nervous system and my soul. Anything more hectic is jangling me.
Perhaps it is also this emergence from lockdown, forced to confront myself so much more deeply and unsure of how to take this new me out into the world. The truth is she doesn’t want to be in the world. She wants to be in the woods, by the streams and rivers and seas. She wants to watch the birds circling overhead and eat handfuls of wild strawberries from the hedgerows. I was a wild child, never happier than out in the woods and fields. I can feel menopause returning her to me, or me to her. I want to be a wild adult too, and a wise one. So I am doing my best to embrace each day as it comes, each moment. To continue to put down all the demands of doing that crowd my thoughts, all the roles that pull my attention away from my centre and away from myself.
This summer, I want to find a way to embrace my wild, sensitive child self and be connected to others through simple circles around the fire, picnics in the woods, quiet days of not much happening on the beach. My heart knows it’s possible. My womb agrees. Dare I ask for this in my life? Dare I receive it? It would mean undoing all of the conditioning that says I have to hide my true nature in order to be part of the world, part of a community. It feels scary and yet deeply right, possible, even achievable. I know deep in my bones that it is my birthright, as it is that of each and every one of us, to be loved just as we are. Will you join me in embracing your full expression with this summer solstice energy? Whatever that might be ????.
If you want to claim your own peri- or menopause journey to reunite the child inside you with the adult you are becoming and would like to explore it safely in a deeply held, sacred space then you can check out my offerings here. I would be honoured to witness all aspects of your wild feminine nature as the magic of menopause brings you home to yourself.
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